Mud Puddles and Pride

“Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall.” 1 Corinthians 10:12, NASB.

Pride is an ugly thing. The minute you think you’ve got it licked, look out! One of the subtle forms of pride that is particularly dangerous to cross-cultural workers is the attitude of superiority. I’ve come half way around the world to help these poor, ignorant savages. Well, perhaps the modern-day follower wouldn’t be as blunt as in days past, but that superior attitude is still very much alive today.

I didn’t think that a superior attitude was an issue for me, but remember what I said about having pride licked? Well, I should have been looking out, but I didn’t see the lesson coming until it was all over!

I’m a city boy. Growing up, my idea of roughing it was going to a hotel that didn’t have cable television. I certainly was not prepared for some of the sparse conditions that I have encountered gathering stories and photos all across the Pacific Rim region. I remember one rainy night in particular. The road leading to the retreat center was too muddy for the four-wheel drive vehicle to pass over it without getting stuck. It was already dark, and we had to hike up a muddy road. It was less than a quarter of a mile, but when you do media it’s practically impossible to travel light. One of the local believers carried my bag for me.

I was very grateful, because it took all my concentration to keep from falling on my hind-end as I carried just myself up and down a muddy hill in the darkness and rain. After we made it to the center, I remember listening as these men told their stories of persecution and suffering for the sake of following Christ. With awe I realized that some of these believers may have to lay down their lives to remain faithful to Jesus. That experience ought to have been enough to keep me humble, but God had more to teach me.

The following morning was sunny. I spent another session doing interviews. Then it was time to hike back to the truck. One of the local believers offered to carry my bag. I’m 6’3” and weigh 230 lbs. I certainly ought to be able to carry my own bag to the truck, so I declined.

I heaved my big, black duffle onto my shoulder and trudged off down the muddy trail. I did all right getting up the hill, but the mud was deeper on the other side going back down. I surveyed my situation. The same brother who had earlier offered to carry my bag was discreetly following me. I pretended not to notice, and started walking gingerly down the hill. The closer I got to the truck, the deeper the mud got. “Oh, come on,” I thought to myself. “I’ll look pretty silly if I can’t make it to the truck.”

Then it happened. I was ten feet from the truck when my feet sank in and stuck hard. I strained and pulled, but I couldn’t get my feet out. I was also surrounded with mud, so I couldn’t put my bag down without making a mess. I looked over, and there was the local believer – watching and waiting. For a split second I didn’t want to ask for help, but then I realized I was being silly. I swallowed my pride and asked if he’d carry the bag for me the rest of the way. He smiled and quickly took the bag. Without the awkward weight on my shoulder, I was quickly able to pull my feet out of the mud and walk the final ten feet to the truck.

I thanked my brother for his assistance and got into the truck. It wasn’t until we were driving down the road that the Spirit convicted me. I started thinking, “Why was it that I didn’t want help carrying my bag?” Well, I didn’t come to be a burden. I came to help them by telling their stories. Then it hit me. I wanted to help them, but I didn’t want to need them.

There it was – the fact that I so disliked being vulnerable with them showed me that I, in fact, felt superior to them. How ugly sin is that it can take a noble thing, like wanting to serve, and turn it into a form of pride.

I’m grateful for the lesson of the mud. The truth is we desperately need our local partners, and we cannot afford to let pride keep us from being transparent with our needs. Most spiritual relationships are meant to be reciprocal. Those of us who most like to serve, also need to learn the grace of being served. We really do need each other.

Pray that:

Pacific Rim workers will learn to be joyfully vulnerable with their local partners.

Believers in the Pacific Rim will be sensitive and responsive to lessons about pride.

God will call out more local partners to the task of reaching the unreached of the Pacific Rim.

Pacific Rim is a region of the International Mission Board, SBC.